Day 10

13:50

Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ! Even by my own lapse standards, I probably just broke my own record of getting up at the time of day that only complete assholes get up at.

Two o'clock in the afternoon.

Loser.

23:30

A poor show, today. I've done a few pictures I needed to cut around for work next week, and I managed to help my girlfriend with her new website, which I'm pleased to have done.

But writing-wise, I'm just starting, at eleven-thirty at night.

03:00

Tried my best to catch up. And that's exactly what it felt like, to be honest. I have the feeling when I start to revise and rewrite, this little section will need more work than most.

It's difficult writing emotional scenes. Getting it sounding at all right is difficult - steering it in the right direction is difficult - and having to sit and work out hurtful situations for characters who have become people you care about - I find it verges on upsetting.

Now I'm writing a scene in which our main man realises his girlfriend, the mother of his child, can never love him again. He's done too much wrong. No matter what he tries, no matter how much he wants to make things right, they never will be. It seems impossible to write such a scene without stirring up all of the most painful memories from my own life as I try to imagine these situations.

I'll be much happier when my characters get back to killing each other.

word count: 2,065
hours writing: 3